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Is this programme right for me?

Who is this programme designed for?

This programme has been lovingly designed for parents who are feeling overwhelmed and are ready and motivated to bring about deep, long term change within themselves, their relationship with their children and in their family lives, and are eager to devote significant time, energy and care to bringing this about.

 

This programme is likely to be a good fit for you if:

  • You are longing for a loving and easy connection with your children, but you are not sure about the best way to bring this wish into your daily, lived reality.

  • ​​You are experiencing chaos and lack of order in your daily life: you are often running late, there is mess everywhere and your family seems to disagree about everything.

  • You know you are ready to change these dynamics but you are unsure what is the first step.

  • You are curious and eager to learn about your child, yourself, and the science and art of connection.

  • You are ready and willing to make changes in your life, and may have been actively seeking out support for some time now (through books, youtube, courses, therapy etc) but are confused about how to piece it all together.

  • You feel uncertain or confused about the different parenting methods you see around you, with people in your life giving you all sorts of contradictory advice. You want to find a way that works well for you and your children.

  • You are attracted to the principles of gentle-parenting approaches (e.g. peaceful parenting, simple parenting, conscious parenting, mindful parenting, attachment parenting or NVC parenting) but you want some support to apply and integrate the principles smoothly, deeply and permanently into your daily life with your children.

  • You want to be confident in your parenting, even in moments of conflict or when there is challenging behaviour.

  • You find yourself using parenting strategies that don’t align with your values or your vision of what you want your life with your children to be like (e.g. shouting, hitting, guilt and shame tactics, rewards and punishments, overusing screens, bribes etc) but you are struggling to find other ways that work.

  • In quiet moments, your mind may wander to anxiety about your children and what might become of them (e.g. If they are like this now, will they become delinquents?? Will they ever be able to cope in the real world?) or may become lost in swirls of guilt and shame (Why did I shout again? What is wrong with me?!)

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If you recognise yourself in any of these statements, this course is likely to be a good fit for your goals and aspirations.

What is the time commitment?

To get the most out of the programme, and to bring about deep, long-term changes in yourself, your family and your relationship with your children, we recommend that you set aside around 4 hours per week for this course, including​:

  • Reading through the weekly emails we will send you to set out the focus for your next couple of weeks (about 15 mins per week).

  • Watching the video lessons for the week (~1-2 hours per week)  

  • Attend the live group coaching session (2 hours per week)

  • Reading learning material for the sessions and working through the practice exercises (about 30 mins per week)

  • Daily journaling and self-reflection exercises (e.g. first thing in the morning or before bed) (~15 mins)

Is this programme likely to be too much for me?

The course is designed for overwhelmed parents, so we provide a lot of support and flexibility to help you to stay within your capacity throughout our time together. ​It is also designed to be an interactive, transformational programme that requires a significant investment of your time, energy and commitment. This programme invites deep and lasting  change, a shift in your thinking and beliefs, changing long-standing patterns of thinking and behaviour, ultimately rewiring your neural patterning and nervous system. It is intended for parents who are ready and willing to make the work of reconnection a top priority for a concentrated period to bring about the vision they have for their family.

 

Our Part: What we offer is all the support, knowledge, structure, community and tools to set you up to be able to make a deep, lasting change in your family life.

 

Your Part: You will bring a willingness to engage deeply with the material, work through the exercises and practices, engage with the community, try things out and ask for support when you need it.

 

We hope you take some time to make sure this course is something that you are open for at this stage in your life. We imagine that this course is likely to work well for you if:

  • Bringing about more peace and harmony in your family life and your relationship with your child is a present and top priority in your life right now.

  • For the duration of our time together on this course, you are willing to shift your priorities, simplify your life and ask for support in order to prioritise the work of reconnecting with yourself and your child.

  • You are excited to spend around 4 hours per week (for the duration of this course) working to bring about the vision you hold for your family, including watching online lessons, attending live coaching sessions, working through self-study materials, doing exercises, journaling practices and engaging with the community (see below).

  • You are able and willing to be a supportive member of this learning community for the duration of our time together, including participating in homegroup practices, empathy buddies, contributing to the group chat by sharing celebrations and challenges, and offering a supportive presence for others.

  • You are open to self-reflecting, examining your conditioning, patterns of thinking and behaving, your conditioning and triggers.

  • You are excited to try out new habits and routines in your family life and to practice new skills and ways of communicating.

  • You have a clear intention of wanting to make changes in your life that last, not just for the duration of the course, but into the future, and are willing to invest time after the course to continue to integrate the principles.

 

If you do not see yourself reflected in these statements, this programme may not be right for you at this season in your life. If you're still not sure if the programme is a good fit for you, feel free to email us and let us know a little more about where you’re at with your family and we are happy to help you to discern whether this programme is likely to be a good match for you at this moment of your journey.

Who is this programme NOT likely to work well for?

We would love it if every parent had an opportunity to learn about connection and gain some skills to care more deeply for themselves and their children. We imagine the world would be a more peaceful and kinder place! However, re-establishing connection with your child and yourself takes time, energy and commitment. It is our sincere wish that only those who have the capacity to engage in this programme sign up - we would love to support you to focus your precious life energy only on endeavours that will support and nurture you and your family.

 

This programme requires a willingness to self reflect, be open to new ideas and be willing to try new behaviours and patterns. It is not likely to be a good fit for you if:​

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  • You love the idea of this, but are just too busy to commit to around 4 hours each week. We believe that staying within our capacity is a radical and world changing choice, and it is very important to us that any work we do together is entirely within your capacity. We want to support people to learn to trust their instincts about this. If this phase of life feels too full for you, and you sense that 3-4 hours a week is not a realistic commitment, this programme is unlikely to work well for you and may add more pressure. Your reluctance to take on any more makes a lot of sense, and we really honour and appreciate your choice! (Feel free to get in touch if you think things might shift for you, and you want to be on the waiting list for next season’s intake.)

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  • You have big changes or commitments in the next few months (e.g. moving house, changing jobs etc). If you think these changes will make it hard to find space and time to commit to this programme, perhaps this is not the right time for you. We hope you honour and take seriously any concerns you have about this, and choose to stay within your capacity. (Feel free to get in touch if things are likely to be easier for you at a later time and you want to be on the waiting list for a later intake.)

 

  • You don’t yet have a family. This is very much a practical focused course drawing from participants’ lived, daily experiences with their children. If you are wanting to become a parent and curious about how to set yourself up in the best way for this, we have other offerings that might be a better fit. Please reach out to us!

 

  • You are very happy with your family life and feel peaceful and confident in your approach to parenting. We want to take a moment to celebrate that you have found strategies and an approach that works so well for you! This programme is designed specifically for parents who are overwhelmed and want to bring about transformation in their lives - if this does not describe you, it may be that you don’t need the type of support offered by this programme in this season of your life. If you are wanting a place to meet like-minded parents who share your parenting approach, a better fit might be a practice group for parents (contact us if you want some pointers) or if you are wanting ongoing support to fine-tune your learning, our one-to-one mentoring package might be a better fit.

 

  • You are extremely triggered, are experiencing significant life trauma or personal pain right now. In this case, you are likely to need more one-to-one support than the community format can offer, and our guided mentoring option might be a more supportive way for you to go through this programme. Please contact us if you would like to discuss your situation and how we might be able to support you further.

 

  • You desperately want fast results. Sometimes we can feel really desperate for instant changes as parents: maybe the school has told you that unless your child starts behaving differently they will take punitive action, maybe you are estranged from your child and you are desperate to have them back right now, or maybe your partner has given you a frightening ultimatum about your child’s behaviour or your approach to parenting. We really get the sense of urgency and the pain and frustration you are experiencing right now.

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And we also want to be transparent that it is our expectation that recreating this precious connection with ourselves and our children will not happen overnight. Deep and lasting change takes time, perseverance and practice; and ultimately a lifelong commitment beyond our time together to prioritise peace, presence and connection. There are many, many ways to force compliance with your child in the short term, but in our experience these short term methods are very costly to our relationships in the long run. 


The invitation in this programme is to slow down (really slow down) in order that we can eventually speed up…together. If you do not have the time, space or willingness in your life at this point to slowly, patiently rebuild this connection, our guess is that this course will be challenging and frustrating for you and is unlikely to be beneficial.

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If, after reading this, you are still unsure whether this programme is right for you in this particular season of your life, you are very welcome to contact us for a chat. It is our sincere wish that only those who will really benefit from this programme will sign up, and we are very open to helping you to discern whether it is likely to be the best step for you right now. If so, we are so excited for you to join us!

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