Embracing the Gift Economy: Why we choose to give our courses away

"The gift economy represents a shift from consumption to contribution, 

from transaction to trust, 

from scarcity to abundance

and isolation to community" 

- Charles Eisenstein, Sacred Economics.

By Sally Prebble (PhD), Cofounder of Peace Talks NZ

What would the world look like if the principles of care, compassion and awareness of human needs - core to Nonviolent Communication (NVC) - were integrated into every part of our lives, including our economic interactions with one another? Which of our many current world crises (e.g., poverty, inequality, polarisation, the climate crisis, wars) might be resolved if the world’s resources flowed to human needs, rather than to those with the greatest advantages of birth or shrewdest business strategies? 

For the past three years at Peace Talks, we have been engaging with such questions by experimenting with an unusual way of offering our courses: we give them away.

To be more precise, instead of charging "market value" for our courses, we ask that people gift us an amount they feel willing and able to contribute. We offer a recommended range, and ask for a minimum deposit to cover our out-of-pocket expenses; but we make it clear that any contribution is acceptable for us - even zero.

This "Gift Economy" approach is a practical step we have chosen to take towards living the change we want to see in the world. Our experiment has been a little uncertain, even uncomfortable, at times...and yet, it is an approach that we have found to be rewarding, exciting, hopeful and life changing.  

Wait...what does NVC have to do with economics?

We tend to think of NVC as being about how we communicate with others, or how we relate inwardly with ourselves. However, NVC also has much to offer in relation to how we structure the systems that organise our world.

The wisdom that NVC can bring to bear on the economic realm is to reveal to us that the systems we currently use to structure our exchanges (e.g. PayPal, banks, money, globalisation, capitalism etc) are simply strategies that we have collectively chosen to meet various needs. We can, therefore, use our NVC understanding to ask, in relation to any given part of this system:

• Is this actually the best strategy to meet needs?
• Whose needs are these systems meeting?
• Are there people (or groups of people) whose needs are not well met?
• Does the system result in economic inequality, with individuals or groups left without their needs met?
• Are the needs of future generations, including our children and grandchildren, being considered?
• Are there hidden ways that the system impacts needs, such as through environmental degradation which depletes our planet’s long-term capacity to meet our needs, by creating social inequality or by leaving large parts of the world living in hunger?

These are massive questions about how to integrate our values with the mind-bogglingly complex global economic machine under which we live. The answers can be so overwhelming that many of us (myself included) can, at times, just give up.

We may attempt to hold onto and protect our NVC values by segregating a small area of life where we can easily apply them (e.g. our close relationships and self healing journey), while assuming that these values cannot or should not be applied to the rest of life (e.g. business and financial dealings, career choices, politics, voting, etc).  

Our deep longing is to find ways to bring the restorative power of NVC into all of the systems and structures that impact our lives, and we are committed to taking small, concrete steps towards this vision. 

At Peace Talks, we want to live the change we want to see in the world (or, as Yoram Mozenson puts it, “live the needs we want to see in the world”) by bringing our values into every aspect of our lives, including how we give and receive financially. 

And we are certainly not alone in this wish. Many NVC practitioners strive to apply the wisdom of NVC beyond the realm of individual relationships and into the systems and structures that govern how we live.  This was a core part of Marshall Rosenberg's vision. He reflected:

“If I use Nonviolent Communication to liberate people to be less depressed, to get along better with their family, but not teach them, at the same time, to use their energy to rapidly transform systems in the world, then I am part of the problem. I am essentially calming people down, making them happier to live in the systems as they are, so I am using NVC as a narcotic.”

- Social Justice Retreat, Switzerland, June 2005

What is the Gift Economy?

Simply put, a gift economy approach attempts to recreate a world where we care for each other and acknowledge that our well-being is inextricably tied up in each others'. It is a way we have found to have some agency in creating a world that is focused on need (not greed).  

The gift economy approach reimagines how we might bring about the kind of deeply caring world we long for while also acknowledging the reality of the economic system we are currently embedded within. It harks back to our traditional, ancient roots when we lived in interconnected communities, and each of us cared for all of us.*

This is very different from the economic system we currently operate within, which, in order to function, relies on widespread 'jackal' ideas and beliefs like “deserving”, punishment and reward, “power over” or the use of force. 

A gift economy approach invites a different approach. Instead of considering “what is the price?” (as in a typical economic exchange) a gift economy approach asks us to consider your needs and my needs together: What do we each need? How does this financial exchange impact us both? This isn’t always easy; but it is very powerful, and potentially life changing. 

A gift economy is an attempt to recreate a world where, even in our economic transactions:

• We can all care for each other.
• We acknowledge that our well-being is inextricably tied to each other.
• Our focus is on need (not greed). 

Why do we do it this way?

We see the Gift Economy approach as a small, concrete step toward a more caring world. We see it as little way we can contribute to: 

• Create systems where resources can flow to needs. We want the support, care and guidance that we offer to flow directly to anyone who needs it, regardless of their financial circumstances.
• Care for integrity and alignment with our values. The values of connection, care and compassion at the heart of NVC are guiding principles in our lives, not “add ons”. The gift economy allows us to offer our services in a way that integrates these values. 
• Model a new way of being, grounded in NVC teaching. We want people to experience what NVC can look like in the “real world”, not just in terms of their relationships with loved ones, but at the level of the systems that govern our lives.   

Our gift to you

For these reasons, at Peace Talks we choose to offer all of our courses and services as a gift. We put a lot of heart, time, energy and passion into creating our courses. They are a way for us to contribute to creating a more peaceful world and we want them to be available to anyone who needs them, regardless of their ability to pay. 

Sharing NVC is our passion, and also the source of our livelihood. The financial contributions from the people we work with are essential to allowing us to meet our families’ basic needs so that we can live, care for our families, and continue doing the work we love. 

There is no set amount that we expect in exchange for our offerings, but our request is that those we share our work with earnestly engage with the gift economy approach. We ask people to consider what they are able and willing to give, or as Miki Kashtan puts it:

"What is the most that you can give without overstretching or moving into resentment?"

A brave, and hopeful, new world

Like any economic approach, the gift economy is a strategy. It is a strategy that we believe contributes to many needs - ours and those of the people we work with.

A gift economy approach transforms the moment of economic exchange into a relational moment - your well-being and mine are brought together into shared consideration.

We are brought into awareness of our inter-dependence, our shared humanity, and our mutual longing for trust and cooperation: “I” and “you” become “we”. It creates a tiny microcosm of possibility - a world where we care for each other, where the implications of our economic choices are more visible to us, and where we are able to use our financial decisions as a way to meet needs and support each other. 

Is this something you are curious to explore?

Article by Sally Prebble (PhD), Cofounder of Peace Talks NZ 

* If you are interested in more background in the gift economy approach, you can read articles by Charles Eisenstein, Miki Kashtan, Genevieve Vaughan among others.